You tell me he is my dad
And I don’t know what that means.
I guess daddies live somewhere else,
Not with you and me?
I like his smiles
And the cute puzzle he brought
He just came to visit?
I ponder that thought.
I’m a few years older now
And Christmas time is here.
Grandma brings some extra presents
Says “they’re from daddy, dear”.
But why didn’t HE bring them?
Where does he live?
He didn’t come to visit?
With presents HE should give?
Grandma says nice things about him
That he loves me very much
Mom says he doesn’t
That he’s hiding behind a crutch
But why can’t I see that love?
If it’s really true.
Won’t he come to visit me?
It makes me feel so blue.
I’m getting bigger now
Making good grades in school
Not understanding something’s missing
And that a missing daddy’s not cool.
Eighth grade graduation is here
A time to move to a NEW school
Surely he will come to this
Mom says he is a fool
He doesn’t come – it makes me sad
And I hope the mean words are wrong
A daddy surely loves his little girl
And wants to be there all along?
I’m growing up, a young lady now
Some bitterness is creeping in
He left us with no support?
I ponder again and again.
He’s missed my birthdays and my straight A’s
He didn’t see me ride my bike
And now I’m starting high school
Something I’m sure I won’t like
It would be nice to see him
To tell him all these things
A part of me still is hoping
One day he will see
That his little girl has grown up
He’s missed so much of her life
I want him to tell me he’s sorry
He didn’t keep mom for a wife
Sorry that we had to live –
Mom struggling every day
To provide the basic necessities
That’s what I want him to say
Graduation day is here!
Honors and scholarships given
Surely he’ll walk in that door
And see the life I’ve been living
Alas he doesn’t show
Mom’s stories must be right
My daddy doesn’t love me
I accept it- but not quite.
I’m getting married!
My special day has arrived!
Will he give me away?
No! My brothers are at my side!
The years are passing quickly
Although I don’t realize
That all along my daddy,
WANTED to be by my side.
You see he struggled daily
Against the demon that ruled his life
He worked and worked to free himself
From the addiction and all the strife
He’d pull out the picture
Of his little girl and boys
He’d feel like a failure
He’d missed so much joy!
He’d vowed to be strong
To start over the next day
But that demon kept calling him back
To the life that was not okay.
At last he became free
Of the burden that held him down!
Would his children ever love him?
That thought brought tears and a frown.
She heard a knock on the door
This man she hardly knew
Sat at her kitchen table
Bearing his soul to her too
He cried and said “I’m sorry,
I love you so much”.
She said “I can’t love you,
You’ve always chosen your crutch”.
He left and nothing was resolved
His heart breaking and hers mad
How can he just show up?
To start something we never had?
Years went by- his health was failing
She had a baby boy
And now she understood
A parent’s pure joy!
She still didn’t understand
The hold the crutch had on dad
But God showed her she must forgive
Even though her life had been bad
Because her Heavenly Father had forgiven her
For all the wrongs she had committed
He accepted her just like she was
And given her new life she was living
She stood at his hospital bed
Praying she would have the chance
To tell him “I forgive you -
Let’s start this life’s dance”.
And God gave her just that
A gift of three good years
In which she told her daddy “I love you”
Watching as it brought tears
A life of memories
And lessons learned
From heartache and sadness
And love that was spurned
God did all the healing
And rightfully so
For he is the healer
That makes our heart grow
Her advice to all the hearts,
That are breaking inside …
Turn to your Heavenly Father
He can make things right.
And whether the demon still holds him
Or he’s free from every hold
Forgive your earthly father
Our Heavenly Father says to do so.Read More